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Let’s start with an appreciation for Shannon’s boyfriend’s son Joe, aka Sean Cody’s Brockington, who also runs an OnlyFans by the name of Lemonade Boy, I assume. The episode opens from where it left off last week, with Braunwyn walking heavily from Shannon’s opening party. (For a rental? Girl.) When he is out front, he looks towards the house, shielding his tear-filled eyes and square sunglasses from the blinding glare of his own humiliation, and sees Joe / Brockington standing in his role as a servant in lemon themed dresses. In a sweet, delusional voice, she asks, “Hey, Lemonade Boy. Can you find my husband?”
There are so many things wrong with this that it turned the corner into being right again, like smoking yourself sober. Braunwyn should know this guy’s name perfectly well, especially since he was invited to renew his Palm Springs vote. What else is wrong is that her husband clearly doesn’t care about her. He saw the fight and decided to stay indoors and talk to the women and be in front of the camera. Finally, she doesn’t need to wait for her husband or hang around: she needs to walk 100 meters down a skinny sidewalk brought by Nutrisystem and hide in her basement nightclub that no one ever uses.
Sean, the shortest living man in California, is inside yelling at Gina about how “rude and inappropriate” she is, while his wife is watering the flowers in Shannon’s garden with her tears. Dude, you should have followed her out of that room. You should have gone and checked her out immediately rather than watching and feeding the drama as a shy fluffer on the saddest porn set in the world (aka Brockington’s other side job).
Eventually, Joe walks over and says, “Your wife is out,” discreetly with a total lack of cunning and a straight face and, well, give this guy a Golden Globe for best newcomer, because I wouldn’t have been so generous. . Then he goes to tell his sisters and Shannon’s children, “Braunwyn called me Lemonade Boy” and you can’t tell if he liked it or is insulted, but whatever he is, he’s a good boy, crazy for Elvis, and he loves horses and her boyfriend too.
When Sean finally comes out, he doesn’t console Braunwyn. Instead, he tells her how she did it all wrong, how she should have put Gina aside for a one-on-one conversation. Then he lets her go back to the party. Okay, if I’ve learned two things from all my years of watching television, they are: never go to a second place with Ann Dowd, and never go back to a party when you’ve just humiliated yourself and ran away.
But she doesn’t enter. Sean he walks in and asks if Gina will come out and talk to his wife, which is such a no-no that there aren’t enough no’s to even know. Gina says he’s uncomfortable, and Emily tells him she’s out of line for yelling at Gina. She also adds that as much as her husband, Shane, is, at least he’s never done anything like this. Shane is not a mannequin. He’s doing what he’s supposed to: stay out of it and eat spaghetti from a martini glass or something. Sean also needs to learn how to get rid of it.
Gina comes out and Braunwyn tearfully tells her that she is now sober and that she had a big problem with alcohol, but as Emily later says, she is using her disclosure as some kind of weapon. Yes, we can say that Braunwyn is fragile and we should all be empathetic for what she’s going through, but that’s not why Gina should give her a lift. Gina sticks to her guns and says Sean’s text with the winking face emoji made her uncomfortable. No matter how she meant it, she was uncomfortable and you can’t take it away from her. Believe women, I always like to say. Unless it’s Anna Delvey. But, you know, you probably believe them too.
Gina walks away saying the conversation is pointless and returns to the party. Braunwyn lingers, like the ultimate unrivaled swinger in an orgy, making one-on-one encounters when she should clearly be home taking a hot bath. After Kelly offers her a shot of tequila as a joke, she comes home and gets on the treadmill and asks Sean to take her to a meeting. Whatever he needs, I guess. I really want him to make it, but honestly, someone recovering so early shouldn’t be practicing the arts and sciences of reality television. Do we have to get Kim Richards to give her a master class?
After the party, all the women take these little side trips. Gina is dealing with her ex Matt and his new girlfriend, Britt. Kelly is preparing for her man, Rick, to move into her house. Emily finally ends up on a group message with Shannon and is overjoyed that “she knows my name and my phone number!”, And it’s a simple, sarcastic teenage joy. I love Emily because we need someone on this show to love.
The only other noteworthy moment is when Kelly and new girlfriend Elizabeth are shopping, and Elizabeth says she is very supportive of Braunwyn and her sobriety journey and would also go to an AA meeting with her. “Oh, I wouldn’t stop,” says Kelly, as honest as Fox News is inaccurate. I’m with Kelly in this one, though. I think dating is a personal thing, and if you need someone to take you there on any occasion, okay, I’ll do my part. But Braunwyn will do two a day alone. He doesn’t need help.
He texts Gina and asks her to go to a meeting with her and then have a coffee to clarify their differences. I think my “children” would have had a very convenient “meeting” during that “meeting”, but I would be totally free to meet her for coffee afterwards. The only thing worse than witnessing an AA encounter with your best friend who’s just sober is attending an AA encounter with someone you don’t even really like who’s just sober.
As we talk about Kelly Dodd, let’s go a little slow with her about her comments on the coronavirus in this episode. This was filmed way back in January, when COVID was still simmering in China and none of us thought it would totally turn our daily lives and world order upside down like it did. Just like Kelly, when I first read about it in China, I thought, Oh here’s another one. Remember when we all went crazy over Ebola and swine flu and nothing happened? In retrospect, yes, Kelly should have taken it more seriously, but you can’t blame her for saying that back then. If she said the same thing now, okay, say it, but let’s give all these ladies some freedom.
While Emily and Kelly are around – and they say in a mischievous tone that Braunwyn was better off drinking – Braunwyn calls and says that she and Sean are in the neighborhood and why don’t they come by? Um, why not send Sean home to polish his immunity necklaces and give the nannies a night off? It doesn’t have to come to everything. It’s not like it’s Simon McCord or he’d look good in skinny red leather pants.
What they’re discussing is Braunwyn’s phone call with Shannon, a little earlier. Braunwyn called Shannon and wanted to make sure that even if they were arguing, Shannon, her boyfriend and all of their children, including Lemonade Boy, would participate in the renewal of her vote. It turns out it’s her and Sean’s 20th wedding anniversary and they’ve decided to renew their vows every ten years. It’s a good idea? Why don’t you ask Shannon? And why would Shannon also want to go to Braunwyn’s vow renewal? She still hasn’t had PTSD since she did it with David and then she got divorced, like, a year and some changes later?
The fight goes something like this: Braunwyn wants Shannon to come and put their differences aside. Shannon can’t stand that Braunwyn still thinks she called Gina’s little apartment “sad” when Shannon thinks not. Braunwyn will not take it back. “I only have what I heard,” he says. “I can’t say I didn’t hear it because I did, but if we want to get over it, we have to find a middle ground.” Did you ever know that Shannon wanted to find a middle ground? He could drive 48 hours on a Peloton and still couldn’t find a middle ground.
What I want to tell both of us is simply to get over it. Yeah, I know they’re doing their job and keeping the tension alive, but this fight is dumber than Brody Jenner after a Whip-Its case. Gina doesn’t care that Shannon said her house is small and, in fact, she doesn’t think so. Braunwyn already has enough things to do right now. He can’t just give in and say, “You know what? I must have just misunderstood you, ”but do you know in her heart that Shannon said that? What Braunwyn is not wrong about is that Shannon will do and say anything to make people believe that Shannon’s image of herself is true, but now that she knows, she can move forward from a place of better knowledge.
And Shannon can’t just get over it? She can’t just say, “You know what? Braunwyn is going through a lot of things. None of the other women think she said that. Until she talks about it, I’ll give her a ride on this.” No, these two are stubborn as two starving hippos. , just sitting on their sides of the table making as much noise as possible while getting those sweet, sweet attention balls in their mouths.
They end the call by saying they will go ahead and Shannon will think about going to Palm Springs for this doomed ceremony, but later she tells John that she doesn’t think she can. “I can’t get past people who say I’m a liar,” she tells him, her face dripping with judgment as if it’s a tea bag just pulled out of a cup. He stares at his crystalline fireplace on his outdoor patio, seeing Braunwyn’s face dancing in the flames. He squints and squints, trying to blur him out of existence, but he’s still there, laughs at her, judges her, giving off enough heat that Shannon knows if she stays there long enough, she’ll burn.
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